What would be a week without a grubette post? Here's grubette from last weekend...
Not being a winner of the 1st Grublog, I didn’t have enough clay chips to play for my weekend’s poker party home game. What a brilliant idea though, you can “rent” chips for free from your local neighborhood card room (“renting” here refers to getting a rack or two of the casino’s clay chips, carrying them into the bathroom with an oversized purse and dumping them in at the same time a toilet flushes to muffle the sound). Hey I paid for them. I hid the racks behind the toilet and sauntered out, no one the wiser. When I got home I considered washing the chips but then they would be much too nice (and counterfeiting could be suspected) to turn back in.
While I was gathering these chips, which was my main purpose in going, I also joined the Fri night tourney and played a little $4/8 beforehand. The tournament sold out a full hour beforehand so it was a cool $8k or so 1st place. Everything was uneventful, except I did get a marriage proposal from a three-time HI-G Friday Night Tourney winner. I also sat with another guy that said he just arrived home after 3 months in Costa Rica and his wife informed him she wanted a divorce. He had just won a $700 tableshare on a jackpot and when they asked his home address for their records, he sadly didn’t know what to say because his wife was kicking him out. He was about 70 years old and said he would miss their 3-year-old baby the most. That reminded me of a joke:
60-year-olds husband and wife were hanging out on their porch one day when they were greeted by a magic fairy. The fairy said, “I’ll grant you each one wish. What would you like, wife?”
The wife immediately replies, “A million dollars.”
And poof! A million dollars appears in front of her.
Fairy turns to the man, “And what would you like, husband?”
The husband immediately responds, “I would like to be married to someone 30 years younger.”
And poof! He turns into a 90-year-old.
I busted out of the tournament so early I didn’t even know what place I was in. Then I played a regular $3/6 game because everything else was full. That also was uneventful except the very last hand. I had A8 and stayed in despite multiple raises. Flop is A-4-5, lots of chips thrown in the middle. Turn is a 7. I’m hanging in there with top pair. And the river is an unbelievable 6. I just check and hello so does everyone else. One guy motions to “send it” and flips up his 3 for the low straight (after everyone but me had turned up their cards). I disappoint him greatly and said I the higher straight and raked in $100+. Right before my blind, so I got up and left.
Outside I met a guy that said he used to go to Vegas when he was a teenager. He said he was 17 when he went for the first time, played and made a few dollars on the slots. Then he boldly moved up to craps, where he won $2200. After nervously cashing in with the cashier oblivious to his age, he went directly home and to the local car lot, where he bought a brand new Chevy. The whole time he was telling it he had a wistful smile on his face, recalling how his youth was so marked by a day of playing dice.
That would’ve made a terrific blog.
The next day was our party where I had it catered by nothing-but-the-best, El Pollo Loco. This is much like Taco Bell, but without a dog mascot. Doug had set up the entire garage as a poker room: green felt table with drinkholders and chipholders, neon artwork on the walls, dim mood lighting (courtesy of the light from the garage door opener) and a pear-scented candle (that was to mask the smell of petrol). He even laid down carpet under the poker table so people could spill drinks on it just like inside!
The party was a hit, as any would be when you ply your friends with free food and drinks. But instead of black beans we got pinto beans. No one enjoys pinto beans!
Poker was a hit too where I ended up winning a whopping $35 and Doug won $40. Excellent. Better than I normally do at HI-G, probably because we were mostly
taking advantage of playing with first-timers. Blinds were 50 cent/$1, and the bets were a $1 the flop through the river.
The next day, we went to El Pollo Loco and told them about the bean mix up. The manager apologized and I demanded another tray of black beans that served 25. She said she’d have it ready in an hour. Then Doug interjected, saying, “Party’s over. Can we get a refund instead?” And she reached into her drawer and gave us $20. As we were leaving, Doug said, “What would you do with a huge tray of black beans anyway?” Beats me.
We also went to the Lakers vs. Bucks that night at the Staples Center. True to LA form, $8 peanuts, $10 beers.. popcorn, hotdogs.. and sushi. I was scanning the floor seats for stars.. there was Jack Nicholson of course, regulars Penny Marshall and Dyan Cannon, John McEnroe, Pierce Brosnan, Urkel (from "Family Matters" — hey who cares?), Denzel Washington and Sylvester Stallone. At the end of the game, which the Lakers squeaked out a win in overtime, I yelled, “Rocky!” out in the stands while Sly was leaving, signing autographs. There were so many good-looking, cosmetically enhanced people there. One particular front-row beauty had a tight pink shirt with lots of filling. She was so voluptuous, my friends and I tried to determine if she was surgically modified or if it really mattered. Then the Lakers girls came out with all black outfits (one of their many costume changes) and the white lettering “buy.com” on their chests. I felt this advertising was in no way beer or sport related and therefore inappropriate. My friend remarked that tight-pink-shirt girl should have “bought.com” on her chest instead.. hahaha.
Hmm.. now I have to go return those chips I “rented.” Maybe this week..
blueberry bagel with cream cheese
1/2 cranberry bagel with cream cheese
bean sprout & cucumber cream cheese 1/2 sandwich
ham & salami 1/2 sandwich
cucumber & hot pepper & provolone cheese 1/2 sandwich
2 chocolate chip cookies